Saturday, February 13, 2010

THIS VIDEO WILL GET YOU LAID

This is even better than the montage reel at the end of CINEMA PARADISO (1989). Thank you Matt Zoller Seitz!

Happy Hallmark Card Day

Saturday, February 6, 2010

2009 YEAR-END BALLOT

These are what my nominees and *winners would be if I had any say in the self congratulatory mess that is the Academy Awards. I'm gonna go ahead and assume the AMPAS doesn't nominate movies that are entirely in a foreign language for Best Picture anymore (They haven't since CROUCHING TIGER in 2000) So 35 SHOTS OF RUM, my favorite French film of 2009, will be bumped down to said category to make room. Also, I have to wait for my local Magnolia theatre to screen the live action/animated shorts before I can add the BEST SHORT category. Sorry.
(short categories added 2/23)

Top lists are my nominees, bottom lists are the actual nominees (actual winners added 3/8). In parentheses next to each category is my prediction for what I think will win the Oscar.








*TWO LOVERS                    (HURT LOCKER)
CORALINE
FANTASTIC MR. FOX
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
UP
MOON
A SERIOUS MAN
TETRO
THE HURT LOCKER
BRONSON

actual oscar nominees:
AVATAR
THE BLIND SIDE
DISTRICT 9
AN EDUCATION
THE HURT LOCKER (won)
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
PRECIOUS
A SERIOUS MAN
UP
UP IN THE AIR








*35 SHOTS OF RUM              (WHITE RIBBON)
STILL WALKING
A PROPHET
SUMMER HOURS
EVERLASTING MOMENTS
PONYO
TOKYO SONATA
THE HEADLESS WOMAN
LORNA'S SILENCE
TAXIDERMIA

actual oscar nominees:
AJAMI
THE MILK OF SORROW
A PROPHET
THE SECRET IN THEIR EYES (won)
THE WHITE RIBBON










*James Gray for TWO LOVERS    (Bigelow)
Claire Denis for 35 SHOTS OF RUM
Quentin Tarantino for INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
Wes Anderson for FANTASTIC MR. FOX
Kathryn Bigelow for THE HURT LOCKER

actual oscar nominees:
James Cameron for AVATAR
Kathyrn Bigelow for THE HURT LOCKER (won)
Quentin Tarantino for INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
Lee Daniels for PRECIOUS
Jason Reitman for UP IN THE AIR











*Tilda Swinton in JULIA             (Sandra Bullock)
Charlotte Gainsbourg in ANTICHRIST
Carey Mulligan in AN EDUCATION
Michelle Monaghan in TRUCKER
Abbie Cornish in BRIGHT STAR

actual oscar nominees:
Sandra Bullock in THE BLIND SIDE (won)
Helen Mirren in THE LAST STATION
Carey Mulligan in AN EDUCATION
Gabourey Sidibe in PRECIOUS
Meryl Streep in JULIE AND JULIA










*Joaquin Phoenix in TWO LOVERS     (Jeff Bridges)
Tom Hardy in BRONSON
Tahar Rahim in A PROPHET
Sam Rockwell in MOON
Vincent Gallo in TETRO

actual oscar nominees:
Jeff Bridges in CRAZY HEART (won)
George Clooney in UP IN THE AIR
Colin Firth in A SINGLE MAN
Morgan Freeman in INVICTUS
Jeremy Renner in THE HURT LOCKER











*Samantha Morton in THE MESSENGER    (Mo'Nique)
Isabella Rossellini in TWO LOVERS
Diane Kruger in INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
Marcia Gay Harden in WHIP IT
Mo'Nique in PRECIOUS

actual oscar nominees:
Penelope Cruz in NINE
Vera Farmiga in UP IN THE AIR
Maggie Gyllenhaal in CRAZY HEART
Anna Kendrick in UP IN THE AIR
Mo'Nique in PRECIOUS (won)











*Christoph Waltz in INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS           (Christoph Waltz)
Christian McKay in ME AND ORSON WELLES
Jude Law in RAGE
Robert Duvall in THE ROAD
Niels Arestrup in A PROPHET

actual oscar nominees:
Matt Damon in INVICTUS
Woody Harrelson in THE MESSENGER
Christopher Plummer in THE LAST STATION
Stanley Tucci in THE LOVELY BONES
Christoph Waltz in INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS (won)











*INGLOURIOUS BASTERDSTarantino       (LOCKER)
A SERIOUS MAN - Ethan & Joel Coen
TWO LOVERS - James Gray; Ric Menello
LORNA'S SILENCE Luc & Jeanne-Pierre Dardenne
THE HURT LOCKER - Mark Boal

actual oscar nominees:
THE HURT LOCKER (won)
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
THE MESSENGER
A SERIOUS MAN
UP










*IN THE LOOP - Armando Iannucci    (UP IN THE AIR)
FANTASTIC MR. FOX - Wes Anderson; Noah Baumbach
BRIGHT STAR - Jane Campion
BROTHERSDavid Benioff
CORALINEHenry Selick

actual oscar nominees:
DISTRICT 9
AN EDUCATION
IN THE LOOP
PRECIOUS (won)
UP IN THE AIR











*FADOS                                   (THE COVE)
OF TIME AND THE CITY
LA DANSE
THE ENGLISH SURGEON
THE COVE
WHICH WAY HOME
THE BEACHES OF AGNES
TYSON
ANVIL! THE STORY OF ANVIL
IN SEARCH OF BEETHOVEN


actual oscar nominees:
BURMA VJ
THE COVE (won)
FOOD INC.
THE MOST DANGEROUS MAN IN AMERICA
WHICH WAY HOME












*CORALINE                          (UP)
FANTASTIC MR. FOX
UP
PONYO
MONSTERS VS ALIENS
9
A TOWN CALLED PANIC
A CHRISTMAS CAROL
MARY AND MAX
THE HAUNTED WORLD OF EL SUPERBEASTO


actual oscar nominees:
CORALINE
FANTASTIC MR. FOX
THE PRINCESS AND THE FROG
THE SECRET OF KELLS
UP (won)










*TETRO - Mihai Malaimare Jr., RSC, ASC      (LOCKER)
EVERLASTING MOMENTS - Jan Troell, FSF
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS - Robert Richardson, ASC
BRIGHT STAR - Greig Fraser, ACS
ANTICHRIST Anthony Dod Mantle, DFF, BSC

actual oscar nominees:
AVATAR (won)
HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE
THE HURT LOCKER
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
THE WHITE RIBBON












*INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS - Sally Menke   (LOCKER)
THE HURT LOCKER - Bob Murawski; Chris Innis
CRANK: HIGH VOLTAGE Marc Jakubowicz; Fernando Villena
WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE - James Haygood;Eric Zumbrunnen
AVATAR Stephen Rivkin; John Refoua; James Cameron

actual oscar nominees:
AVATAR
DISTRICT 9
THE HURT LOCKER (won)
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
PRECIOUS













*SHERLOCK HOLMES - Hans Zimmer >       (UP)
FANTASTIC MR. FOX - Alexandre Desplat >
UP - Michael Giacchino >
MOON - Clint Mansell >
AVATAR - James Horner >

actual oscar nominees:
AVATAR
FANTASTIC MR. FOX
THE HURT LOCKER
SHERLOCK HOLMES
UP (won)














*AVATAR - Rick Carter                             (AVATAR)
WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE - K.K. Barrett; Lisa Thompson
SHERLOCK HOLMES Sarah Greenwood; Katie Spencer
A SINGLE MAN Ian Phillips; Amy Wells
IMAGNIARIUM OF DR. PARNASSUS - Anastasia Masaro;Caroline Smith

actual oscar nominees:
AVATAR (won)
IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS
NINE
SHERLOCK HOLMES
THE YOUNG VICTORIA














*A SINGLE MANArianne Phillips  (YOUNG VICTORIA)
IMAGINARIUM OF DR. PARNASSUSMonique Prudhomme
BRIGHT STAR - Janet Patterson
PUBLIC ENEMIES Colleen Atwood
THE YOUNG VICTORIA Sandy Powell

actual oscar nominees:
BRIGHT STAR
COCO BEFORE CHANEL
THE IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS
NINE
THE YOUNG VICTORIA (won)












*STAR TREK - Barney Burman, Mindy Hall, Joel Harlow (YOUNG VICTORIA)
IL DIVO - Aldo Signoretti, Vittorio Sodano
DRAG ME TO HELL - Kurtzman, Nicotero, Berger
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS - Kurtzman, Nicotero, Berger
THE YOUNG VICTORIA - Jon Henry Gordon, Jenny Shircore

actual oscar nominees:
IL DIVO
STAR TREK (won)
THE YOUNG VICTORIA














*STAR TREK                          (AVATAR)
AVATAR
THE HURT LOCKER
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
UP

actual oscar nominees:
AVATAR
THE HURT LOCKER (won)
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
STAR TREK
UP













*INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS      (AVATAR)
THE HURT LOCKER
DISTRICT 9
STAR TREK
AVATAR

actual oscar nominees:
AVATAR
THE HURT LOCKER (won)
INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
STAR TREK
TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN











*AVATAR                            (AVATAR)
DISTRICT 9
WHERE THE WHILD THINGS ARE
STAR TREK
TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN

actual oscar nominees:
AVATAR (won)
DISTRICT 9
STAR TREK












*MIRACLE FISH               (INSTEAD OF ABRACADABRA)
"INTERIOR DESIGN" [segment of TOKYO]
THE DOOR
I DO AIR
GRIZZLY BEAR: TWO WEEKS

actual oscar nominees:
THE DOOR
INSTEAD OF ABRACADABRA
KAVI
MIRACLE FISH
THE NEW TENANTS (won)













*ANGRY MAN              (MATTER OF LOAF & DEATH)
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
PARTLY CLOUDY
A MATTER OF LOAF AND DEATH
LOGORAMA
MOTHER OF MANY

actual oscar nominees:
FRENCH ROAST
GRANNY O'GRIMM'S SLEEPING BEAUTY
THE LADY AND THE REAPER
LOGORAMA (won)
A MATTER OF LOAF AND DEATH










The following categories are inspired by The Muriel Awards









*1) "REVENGE OF THE GIANT FACE" Theatre massacre  - climax of  INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
2) "Married Life" montage with Ellie and Carl - UP
3) "Goy’s Teeth" sequence - A SERIOUS MAN
4) Jake's 1st Banshee ride with Neytiri - AVATAR [IMAX 3D]
5) Coraline enters the alternate world - CORALINE [3D]
6) Ponyo running atop waves next to Sosuke's car - PONYO
7) Malik's first murder - A PROPHET
8) Parking garage sequence - DRAG ME TO HELL
9) Defusing car bomb - THE HURT LOCKER
10) The assassination of John Dillinger - PUBLIC ENEMIES
11) 3rd story finale. “Life support self-mutilation” act. - TAXIDERMIA
12) Michelle’s broken undressing at fire escape window - TWO LOVERS
13) Sea side struggle w/Vampire Tae-ju waiting for sunrise - THIRST
14) Old Spock mind melds with young Kirk - STAR TREK
15) Fox calls out to a lone stoic omega wolf - FANTASTIC MR. FOX



Also this;









*INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
STILL WALKING
SUMMER HOURS
BROTHERS
THE MESSENGER










*1) Woody Harrelson in THE MESSENGER, ZOMBIELAND, DEFENDOR and 2012
2) WETA Digital for AVATAR, DISTRICT 9 and LOVELY BONES
3) John Woo for the epic RED CLIFF part 1 and part 2
4) Greg Nicotero - special makeup for DRAG ME TO HELL, INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS, SURROGATES
5) Clifton Collins Jr. in EXTRACT, SUNSHINE CLEANING, STAR TREK, CRANK: HIGH VOLTAGE














*1) Duncan Jones for MOON
2) Ti West for HOUSE OF THE DEVIL
3) Sergei Dvortsevoy for TULPAN
4) Rupert Wyatt for THE ESCAPIST
5) Chris Fuller for LOREN CASS
6) Lee Chung for MUNYURANGABO
7) Scott Teems for THAT EVENING SUN
8) Drew Barrymore for WHIP IT
9) David Patrick Lowery for ST. NICK
10) Peter Strickland for KATALINA VARGA
11) Peter Sohn for PARTLY CLOUDY
12) Rob Letterman for MONSTERS VS. ALIENS














*1) Tom Hardy in BRONSON
2) Christoph Waltz in INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS
3) Tahar Rahim in A PROPHET
4) Carey Mulligan in AN EDUCATION
5) Christian McKay in ME & ORSON WELLES
6) Jason Clarke in THE HUMAN CONTRACT
7) Alden Ehrenreich in TETRO
8) Don Glover in MYSTERY TEAM
9) Nicole Beharie in AMERICAN VIOLET








10TH ANNIVERSARY AWARD FOR BEST PICTURE




*1) EYES WIDE SHUT
2) MAGNOLIA
3) THE IRON GIANT
4) PRINCESS MONONOKE
5) AFTER LIFE
6) THE STRAIGHT STORY
7) THE INSIDER
8) FELICIA'S JOURNEY
9) BEING JOHN MALKOVICH
10) THE LIMEY








25TH ANNIVERSARY AWARD FOR BEST PICTURE




*1) BLOOD SIMPLE
2) STRANGER THAN PARADISE
3) GREMLINS
4) PARIS, TEXAS
5) EL NORTE
6) STARMAN
7) THE TERMINATOR
8) REPO MAN
9) THE NEVERENDING STORY
10) ONCE UPON A TIME IN AMERICA









50TH ANNIVERSARY AWARD FOR BEST PICTURE




*1) THE 400 BLOWS
2) WILD STRAWBERRIES
3) SOME LIKE HOT
4) RIO BRAVO
5) ANATOMY OF A MURDER
6) TOUCHEZ PAS AU GRISBI
7) IMITATION OF LIFE
8) SHADOWS
9) APARAJITO
10) ON THE BEACH









TOP 10 FILMS OF THE DECADE: 2000s
*1) MULHOLLAND DRIVE (2001)
2) THE NEW WORLD (2005)
3) YI YI (2000)
4) GEORGE WASHINGTON (2000)
5) ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND (2004)
6) IN THE MOOD FOR LOVE (2000)
7) THE ROYAL TENENBAUMS (2001)
8) L'ENFANT (2002)
9) SPIRITED AWAY (2002)
10) PLATFORM (2000)









BEST DIRECTORIAL BODY OF WORK: 2000s
*1) Wes Anderson  - ROYAL TENENBAUMS, LIFE AQUATIC, DARJEELING LIMITED, FANTASTIC MR. FOX
2) Coen Brothers - O BROTHER WHERE ART THOU, MAN WHO WASN'T THERE, NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN,  BURN AFTER READING, A SERIOUS MAN
3) Claire Denis - TROUBLE EVERY DAY, FRIDAY NIGHT, THE INTRUDER, 35 SHOTS OF RUM, WHITE MATERIAL
4) Bong Joon-ho - BARKING DOGS NEVER BITE, MEMORIES OF MURDER, THE HOST, MOTHER
5) Steven Spielberg - ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE, MINORITY REPORT, CATCH ME IF YOU CAN, WAR OF THE WORLDS, MUNICH
-tie- Gus Van Sant - GERRY, ELEPHANT, LAST DAYS, PARANOID PARK, MILK










BEST FEMALE PERFORMANCE OF THE DECADE: 2000s
*1) Naomi Watts in MULHOLLAND DR.
2) Sally Hawkins in HAPPY-GO-LUCKY
3) Tilda Swinton in JULIA
4) Kate Winslet in ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND
5) Emma Thompson in WIT












BEST MALE PERFORMANCE OF THE DECADE: 2000s
*1) Daniel Day-Lewis  in THERE WILL BE BLOOD
2) Heath Ledger in BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN
3) Javier Bardem in NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN
4) Paul Giamatti in AMERICAN SPLENDOR
5) Mickey Rourke in THE WRESTLER











BEST WEB-BASED FILM CRITICISM
*1) Glenn Kenny at Auteurs & Some Came Running
2) Keith Uhlich at Time Out New York & House Next Door
3) Jim Emerson at Scanners
4) Simon Abrams at NyPress, Slant Magazine & Extended Cut
5) Stephanie Zacharek at Salon










BEST MOVIE-RELATED WEBSITE
*1) THE HOUSE NEXT DOOR Even more so now that they've merged with Slant Magazine, THND has the smartest bunch of cinematic critical thinkers contributing to it regularly. Most of my favorite writers actually. Matt Zoller Seitz started it, and then you've got: Ed Gonzalez, Nick Schager, Rob Humanick, Vadim Rizov, Keith Uhlich, Simon Abrams, Lauren Wissot, and Bill Weber. Just a few of the intelligent voices you'll find there.
2) SERGIO LEONE AND THE INFIELD FLY RULE Besides Roger Ebert and Glenn Kenny, there's probably not another American film enthusiast capable of making me see a movie in completely new light the way Dennis Cozzalio can.
3) THE AUTEURS NOTEBOOK Invaluable daily reading for all cinefreaks in love with world film
4) THE FILM TALK If you've never heard Gareth Higgins and Jett Loe passionately debate a film, you're missing out on the best film podcast around
5) GORDON AND THE WHALE My nerdy friends Chase & Rusty that run this site and all of their contributors have an infectious love for movies that is simply adorable







Other year-end ballots posted at The Wandering Image:   1980, 1981, 1982, 1983, 1984, 1985, 1986, 1987, 1988, 1989, 1990, 1991,1992,
 199319941995199619971998199920002001, 2002, 2003,
 2004200520062007200820092010201120122013, 2014



(post what your choices would be in comments section below)