230) BEYOND THE MASK
(2015 dir. Chad Burns) Date Seen: June 20 2015
THE REDCOATS ARE COMING via MEDIOCRE CGI
It's like THE PATRIOT (2000) meets Ubisoft's Assassin's Creed, only
it comes with that authenticated "Christian" seal of approval (courtesy
Burns Family Studios, LLC). So you get to pat yourself on the back
afterwards for witnessing a movie of bona fide faith.
For real though; screenplay so tonally muddled & historically misty-eyed,
you'd believe Glenn Beck himself penned the final draft. It's a movie written at the 6th grade level pitched at old evangelicals who
still think & feel at that 6th grade level. And all of this before we
even begin to complain about the production, craft, staging, etc.
(for additional mental midget cinéma, see also; MEET
THE SPARTANS, ATLAS SHRUGGED, anything by Dinesh D'Souza, EXPELLED NO INTELLIGENCE ALLOWED, LAST
OUNCE OF COURAGE, BUCKY LARSON)
229) I AM BIG BIRD:
THE CAROLL SPINNEY STORY
(2014 dir. LaMattina/C.N. Walker) Date Seen: June 20 2015